Über Mich

“About the reason we exist and why we love and fight.”

There was this point in my life, just after I had finished my (fashion design) studies, when, due to different circumstances, I was desperate to find ‘the reason of life’. I felt as if I couldn’t continue it otherwise. My deepest struggle was: Why I am alive and secondly: Why people have to suffer (and to clarify: I am not only referring to people which live in war situations but also to the people I am surrounded with, the ones, whom we might think are well and happy).

Also begann ich, etwas über unseren Körper und unser Bewusstsein zu lernen, um zu verstehen, warum wir so denken, wie wir es tun und warum wir so sind, wie wir sind. Ich erforschte Anatomie, Biologie, Chemie, klinische Pharmakologie, Neurowissenschaften, Ernährungswissenschaft, Philosophie, Physik, Physiologie, Psychologie, soziale und kulturelle Anthropologie und Soziologie. Ich schaute auch auf alternative Praktiken wie Ayurveda und traditionelle chinesische Medizin. Eigentich war ich einfach neugierig auf alle Entdeckungen, die von und auf uns Menschen bezogen, gemacht wurden von der Vergangenheit bis heute (glaub mir, es gibt eine Menge ...).

Die Zeit verging und es könnte sein, dass ich ein wenig besessen davon wurde, uns Menschen und unseren Körper, Geist und Seele verstehen zu wollen. Am Ende war es jedoch dieses Wissen, das mir das Selbstvertrauen und die Kraft gab, weiterzumachen, als ich das Leben in Frage stellte.

It turned Juli in the year of 2021 and a human, whom I love very much, died next to me. This event deeply affected my world and looking back now, it was a point in my life to which I would love to go back with the understanding I have today, but I guess that often (or always?) is the case..

Today I know: ‘Life teaches you lessons before feeling ready for them’ and:‘You can not control everything, even if you wish for it super bad.’ I accept that, I can not prevent people from leaving this planet, nor make everyone feel good with their lives, you all choose that for yourself. Still, I can share my experience and share what helped me , maybe you can profit from it aswell.

Sharing this it is important to me because I love you, I see you as my family and I want you to be happy.

Eigentlich wünsche ich mir nichts mehr.

In Liebe,

Wanda J.

Fußnote:
Due to the country and time I was born into, I am able to study and research by myself. I understand that this is an immense benefit, and I am extremely thankful for that. That is another reason for me to share.